Dearest Luna,
My online pregnancy tracker advised me a few months back to start writing a journal for you to read when you were old enough to understand. I have not written a journal in ages, to be honest. The closest I have come to doing one is through this blog. And yet, my last meaningful entries are more than two years old now, so I guess that technological transition has gone the bumpy route as well.
I am 32 weeks pregnant this week; we are holding your coming-out party on Sunday! Papa has been working hard to make ends meet as I have quit my job to concentrate on you and get busy nesting. I could say that it is not hard not to like this condition, but beyond the aches and pains is the thought that I never knew I'd ever have you. Your Papa and I wanted this -- and thank God for granting us our miracle. In the words of Oscar Hammerstein II, I must have done something good!
Everything I think and decide on now has got something to do with you, Isabela. You haven't been born yet and you already influence everything Papa and I do. We have so many hopes and dreams for you and cannot wait to meet you soon to share them with you.
Yet, I have so many fears and doubts. Will I be a good parent? Will I be able to teach you and show you the good, the decent, what is right from wrong? Do I need to be perfect now that I'll have you looking up to Mama?
I (will try to) sleep now secure in the thought that you are safe and warm. I wish you sweet dreams; know that you are cared for, loved and awaited.
Love, Mama